Friday, August 30, 2013

breaking free.

The end of August is drawing near and I feel a bit reflective. I've had a mild migraine since early this morning and took something for it and it's still here, gently nagging.

Remember when I talked about going to try to get a mammogram done and how I was experiencing pain on the side of boob, up near my armpit? Well, since that day is July, I put my game face on and I started cutting back on my caffeine intake, as suggested by one of the techs at the office. I first stopped drinking regular tea. I then switched to decaf instant coffee (realizing that there are still trace amounts of caffeine in that) within that week.
can i do this?!
Psalm 64:1, 5 "God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble." + "God is in the midst of her; she shall not be moved: God shall help her, and that right early."

In just two weeks of making those changes, the pain was gone! Wow, right!? About a month later, on August 8th, I decided to stop drinking coffee! Today marks day 23 of being coffee free! I FINALLY confronted my fear of this change as I realized that I was a coffee addict. It might sound funny, and it does make me laugh, but it was serious. I am not saying coffee is bad, in fact, it has antioxidants, but for me, it was a problem. It was my drug,"my own personal brand of heroin" (gosh, i sound like Edward in Twilight). I didn't want that addiction to control me. I wanted to break free and I did so with the help of Christ. Prayer helped and amazingly, this letting-go has been easier than I thought. [special thanks goes to A.L& K.L for the prayers & rolos] I was stronger than I thought, though I believed in myself that I could do this, as I had been mentally preparing for this day for months.

I looked forward to every.single.morning of one cup (sometimes 2) of home brewed coffee. Everytime I'd leave the house, I'd try to think of if there was a starbucks or coffee shop nearby so I could get a coffee contained frapp or iced drink. Believe me, I know where all the starbucks are within a 3 mile radius of my home!

Now, I still frequent starbucks often, but it's for coffee free drinks like their double chocolate chip frap or the strawberries and cream frap. I've made each of those my go-to drinks in my own way, like no extra chocolate sauce or whip and adding toffee nut flavor to the strawberry one.You may ask or think that I am replacing one addiction for another? Maybe. However, I find that I don't crave the above drinks like I had with the coffee ones.
Isaiah 64:8, "But now, O LORD, You are our Father, We are the clay, and You our potter; And all of us are the work of Your hand."

Do I miss coffee? Hmm,yes, a bit, when I really think about it, but honestly don't think about it that much on a daily basis or I try not to think about it :) I now have replaced my morning fix with watered down orange juice, which I thoroughly enjoy. Positive changes, like this one, take a conscious daily effort. I am so thankful to have God on my side. As I draw strength from him, I draw nearer to him and all the good he has in store for me. I will continue to follow Jesus all the days of my life & forever. He is the potter who is molding me and holding me safely in the palm of his hand.

Gonna leave you with this beautiful song from a "new" duo I discovered two days ago, All Sons & Daughters. Enjoy.

Did you used to be a coffee addict? When did you stop drinking it? 
How did you break free from any addiction?

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Anonymous said...

I gave up my morning Pepsi, I think it helped aid in my week hospital stay earlier this year for severe ulcers. I still miss it sometimes but most days I just stick to water and one caffeine free Vernors ginger ale a day.

Lex said...

how awesome! you're motivating me to find a habit I'd like to get rid of and replace it with something better! :)

Barbara A Mizzoni Young said...

I drink one cup of coffee each morning. I have given up coffee on several occasions, but seem to always go back to it. Occasionally I'll mix it up and have a cuppa tea.


Victoria said...

good for you! every new year's my resolution is to give up caffeine (i don't drink coffee, but i get it from tea). i don't like that feeling of relying on it to NOT get a headache. i'm usually good for a bit, but i always break down and start again. maybe i should try again and quit for good!
Victoria @ Lost in Boston