emotional & spiritual spillage

Oh hello! it's June!

 

What happens when I don't blog for days? I spill my guts with thoughts that have been bouncing around. Be prepared for a long read.

I was sort of caught off guard last week when one of my caregivers asked me (I was talking about Crazy Love with her), "why do you get stressed or worried? I don't get how a person like you can get stressed or worried."

...(crickets)...WHAT!?

Just because I need care to get dressed, shower or toilet and have someone cook and do laundry for me doesn't mean my life is easy.

I don't get how she can think that. No one is immune to how life affects them. I always find myself, especially around here, my home, having feel the need to explain myself.

I didn't care to explain so much, but just gave her one example of why I stress or worry. It's mostly internal/self-conflict reasons that causes worry or stress.

Ever since reading Crazy Love, I've been trying to be more intentional with my time. I've been trying to put my trust in God and allow Him to help me with the worry or stress I carry. With how and when I pray and commune with God; "not just a 3 minute mumbled prayer" when i try to go to sleep.

God is so great. My eyes are filling up with tears at how wonderful He is. I am so blessed, even when I don't deserve such blessings, because I am always messing up. I am not an angel. My grandpa says with a chuckle, "alot of people, they are no angels."

I know grandpa. I know.

We won't ever be perfect here in this life, as Jesus is the only perfect Son, but we can attain to better ourselves and simply accept the grand love that God offers us.
Because of His grace, he loves me despite my flaws.
Because of His grace, he makes me into something beautiful.

God continues to show me blessings in my life.{allie, i love you! your friendship means so much to me}. They are treasures waiting to be found! I promise, if you look closely, they are there for you too! I am glad that at least my eyes are open enough to see some of them as I am sure I am oblivious to other ones (let's blame it on human selfish nature.)

Oh dear, I am quite emotional right now lol.

Because making lists is something I just do, here are a few things I want to write to help me of the beautiful things that I've been given. There is Jesus in so many parts of our day! What do you see?

+I am thankful that my mom is here with me. Here, meaning, alive and only an hour away. I am just glad that my mom is my mom. That she chose me, to have me, to love & want whatever makes me happy.

+I am thankful that my dad & stepmom came to hang out with me on sunday for almost three hours. My dad treated me with an iced vanilla coffee! yum.

+I am thankful that I have an appreciation for storytelling through film. Chila and I watched, Of Mice and Men yesterday on netflix and wow. I don't think I could handle reading the book. It's heartbreaking to see the bittersweet tragedy of loving someone so much even though you put them out of their misery (again, they not knowing.)
Maybe sometimes it's better to not be aware of how cruel the world can be?

+I am thankful for encountering the young pregnant lady who is choosing life. She had a really cute shirt on too.

+I am thankful to my grandparent's for going to get Perla's vaccines on such short notice, just so that they could bring their fur baby to come visit me every week. (rules)

and now for your listening pleasure, I leave you with Brandon Heath.
I LOOOOVEE this song!
I am on my way to download it. repeat is in its near future.

stolen, acknowledgement, a highway + puffy eyes

let me begin by announcing that I've now listened to the following song 8 times, ok make that nine as I type this post. Thank you Katie for letting me know that this song was released YESTERDAY and for Alicia for posting the video on her blog, which motivated me to do the same on my blog for your hearing & viewing pleasure.

You're welcome.

Jimmy, are you talking about the time that was spent in a relationship built on a lie? Or are you talking too about a girl that got away? In any case, I want to be stolen away, but there is not a boyfriend to steal me back. lol.

On a related note, I walked w/James & his nephew to Walgreens yesterday. The only real mission was to pick up 72ct paper plate packs that were on sale for 99cents with the in-ad walgreens coupon. Well, I decided to give in to my craving of not-good-for-you-bloat-you-up-too-much-sugar soda.

There I was in deep thought, staring at the refrigerator case swishing my gaze back and forth between wild cherry pepsi or classic coca-cola when I heard,

"hey Brittany." in a manly but friendly voice.

I replied, "who is telling me this?" as I turned around to the left to find one of my favorite Walgreens employees holding a brown box.

"Oh hi Jim. How are you? Yeh, I am trying to decide which soda I want. I rarely drink soda but once in a while I get a craving."

Jim, "yeh me too. though I haven't drank soda I think in like a year."

Wow, I thought. Quite impressive.

Me: "wow that's really good. Oh gosh am i in your way? I am in your way." as I see that he's holding a box of soda that needs to be filed into the slots in the refrigerator case.

Jim: "oh no problem. I'll be out of your way in a sec."

By this time in our convo, James walked up to me as he was further down the aisle. When I turned around again, Jim was gone.

The point of me sharing this story is that it's nice when someone acknowledges you.
That they don't pretend you are not there.

It sort of irritates me when you know you know someone and they know they know you, yet when they see you they don't even say hi?!?
Or when you're in a store or some tight space and you make eye contact with someone and then later they scoot around you and don't say anything.

Maybe they are just preoccupied?
Maybe they don't see you/me? hmm? How could they not see a bulky wheelchair?lol
Maybe they are superficial?
Maybe they only want to be friendly or be a friend when it's convenient for them?
Or maybe they feel insecure?

I always aim to make people feel comfortable around me.

so back to the story. it sort of gave me a mini confidence boost in just the fact that this kind, helpful & handsome guy of the opposite sex talked with me. noticed me. that he could have went in another aisle working without saying hello. but no, he chose to extend this friendly gesture and as simple as it was, it made my day.

Next on my mind, as much as Taylor Swift annoys me (in the past year prob because she is EVERYWHERE) + im not saying I don't like her because I don't know her & how can I judge someone I don't even know; i have to say that I thoroughly am loving this song she is featured on with Tim McGraw &Keith Urban. I am so ready to take a road trip along the highway now! thanks guys!

Yesterday I was feeling pretty blah. I don't know if it was because I was so tired or my allergies, but my eyes got puffy and then later itchy.

hence the barely there eye makeup

Those puppies got all better once I took a benedryl around 9pm. I wasn't sneezing or having a running nose. How could I not know that it was my allergies when i had puffy + itchy eyes?? Blonde moment there! which btw, I don't mean to diss any blondes whatsoever..it's just the stereotypical joke. You don't know but i used to be nearly blonde because I used to get my hair highlighted every 6-8 weeks without fail! anyways, I get ditzy sometimes truth be told. Brunettes are and can be ditzy too. Who cares?! ahhhhhhhh.

This is how I feel.

naptime anyone?

what I wore wednesday: cream lace, mint & army green

Wow! what a wonderful response to me being back to blogging..you all make a girl feel loved. i truly appreciate all of your support and kind love notes you've all left me!

so yeh, Happy Wednesday! 
I am sippin' on a orange berry smoothie while I type this post.

Today's post is about what I wore wednesday, but I also will share below a song that has been circulating my head these past few days.

All photos are taken courtesy of my 77 year old grandpa! He did good huh? lol

my fave pic of the day

shirt:kohl's (handed down from mom) // skirt: downeast basics // bracelet: gift // earrings: oldnavy

________

"I just need someone who can help me get some sleep"

--- when a heart breaks by Ben Rector

(ben, I know what you mean.)

I need Jesus. it's simple, but i make it complicated.
There are scary, unknown things that get thrown our way in life.
We feel overwhelmed and feel like we are getting buried deeper in a dirty, slippery, mud hole.

How will we ever make it out?

We don't need to know all of the answers.
all we need to remember is that the sun still shines bright.
The hand of Jesus is there to hold ours through it all.

life lately

I've been laying here with my laptop on my lap trying to come up with some snazzy title to go with this blog post.

life lately came to mind because, well, these are things lately that make me happy.

+ making lists. see exhibit A:

+ remembering that I have lacked in keeping up with my food journal, thus re-starting recording what I consume on the daily.

see the near month long gap!?

+ my dad & family's new rescued dog, Bogey. Long story short, but it seems that he was abandoned. My brother bubba found him while at work and they bonded and now he has a warm home to roam around and chew up things. Dad says he eats like a horse, but how could you not just love this face?

i texted bubba the night my dad told me that they had Bogey. I said to bubba, I am so glad that you found bogey and that he followed you at work and that you two bonded! I love him already and haven't even met him.

+ being productive & seeing the fine finished product of my labor & creativity

+i recently joined the community of bloglovin!!! come find and follow me  if ya love bloglovin too!

+ replaying "radioactive" by Imagine Dragons and "nothing is wasted" by elevation worship

shoot, I should make another blog post about my current playlist mix!

 

 

what things or persons or furry friends have put a smile on your face? 

any cool songs you've had on repeat?

dj put a record on

While on twitter this morning, a conversation sparked and then sweet Noel of Noel's Beautiful Life and I were tweeting back and forth about music and types we like/dislike and that is where this post came from. Thanks Noel for the idea!

In reference to my post title, i HAD to share this video with you! It is an all-time fave of mine of Madonna's that makes me want to shake it lol (not in public though!) , plus, i can't resist "holiday" but we'll save that video for another special day!!

I absolutely love "discovering" new tunes. I usually seem to find these little treasures from music played during a tv show I like, for example, on Parenthood or One Tree Hill. Orrrr, i even read recommendations from People magazine. Lately, I've heard at least three songs that i have downloaded and played over and over ( one of them is #1 on the list) on tv commercials advertising some product or brand..i think way cool. That's the only reason i may even like commercials, because of the songs, otherwise im flicking the channel like quick.

Here's a list of my current favorites that are on repeat, in no particular order:

1. ho hey-the lumineers

2. free like you make me- cary brothers

3. hold on & hang loose- alabama shakes

4. your life is now-john mellencamp

5. manifesto-the city harmonic

6. round and round & it's time -imagine dragons

7. when we were young-lucy schwartz

8. halfway home-tribes

9. take heart-hillsong united

10. when my time comes-dawes

11. scavenger-  school of seven bells

12. chicago-sufjan stevens

 

Maybe you've heard some of them, maybe you haven't, either way, maybe you'll find a new fave. Most of the songs fall into the indie rock/singer-songwriter/christian realm or whatever you'd like to classify them as. This is the kind of music that moves my soul, that speaks to my heart where i just lovveeee it and feel happy. And i'd like to add that I do enjoy other types of music including: country, oldies, bluegrass, folk, pop, hip-hop, it all just depends ya know.

So friends, tell me what are your current songs on repeat!? I'd like to know what makes your ears happy because i always like checking out songs/music that I've never knew or heard of. Thanks! :)

P.S. I'd like to say HELLO and WELCOME to my new followers!! Thank you for visiting and then coming back for more! It amazes me that this many people like my little blog! 

and if you like giveaways, make sure to enter my first giveaway in reaching 50+ followers AND go visit fontenot four blog where Sarah is hosting a massive blogiversary giveaway that I am participating in! you'll be happy you did! lots of great prizes from amazing ladies!

takin it back to the 90's

 i am SO not gangster by any means. I am not THAT into hiphop, but I wanted to take you back to the 1990's when i was a kid and as a few of these faves were crossing the airwaves as we experienced heatwaves! Swimming pools at our apartment complex's, water guns, popsicles, bbq grilled chicken & corn on the cob, early morning cartoons & coloring remind of summer days.

that girl is poisonnnnnnn..mhmmm..

I was like 8 years old when this song was popular! For some reason, this song played in my head as I was waking up a couple days ago. I'd like to dedicate this song to my cousin Steph. I think when she was in elementary or jr high, she did a dance routine in the talent show to this song! (remember steph?!lol)

and then im sure you know this song, yo wiggity wiggity whack! hahahaha

This song totally reminds me of when my family & cousins went to stay in a cabin in pinetop. I gotta go pee pee? what!? lol.

and everybody's gotta a lil love for ice ice baby!

"ok stop, everybody collaborate & listen"----prophetic words for our times? the issues we could solve if we followed Robert Van Winkle's advice. mmm yeh!

For those of you born in the 80's or grew up in the 80's, you'll probably appreciate this post! What were some of your favorite 90's songs?

Have a happy weekend!